We’ll all experience hurt feelings in this lifetime. And when we feel those blows to our ego or stabs in our back, instinctively we want to lash out, fight back, or coil up and protect ourselves. As a yogi, practicing ahimsa (non-violence), this can be challenging.

When someone acts out towards you in a hurtful or attacking sort of way, just imagine for one moment, where that might be coming from. It’s likely they have been attacked themselves in the past, made to feel less than worthy, and have learned to act this way towards others. If we can compassionately see the suffering that all human beings have experienced (and we don’t need to know specifically what this is), it becomes easier for us to change our samscara (pattern/habit) of reactively retaliating on our attacker.

We can do this to ourselves, when we beat ourselves up over anything. This mental self-harm can be just as hurtful, if not more so, than external forces. The feeling of being less-than or not good enough comes from somewhere – a past wound deep inside. But when we can see that our current samscara of negative thoughts comes from past suffering, we have the opportunity to soften around that and attempt to be less hard on ourselves.

It’s a process. The latest time it has taken me three days and four yoga classes to process a hurtful and anxiety provoking attack. If these kind of experiences produce anxiety in your body (as they do in mine) try super grounding standing poses, forward folds, and lots of gentle restorative yoga. Avoid big back bends if these experiences tend to be expressed in your heart-space. If you are the opposite, and find these experiences make you cave in around your heart, and sadden, that your energy is lessened and your body feels lethargic, try very small backbends – stick to low cobra in your active practice and incorporate standing poses focused on the feet, then as you move towards restorative, try just a little lift beneath your heart, perhaps a blanket rolled up very minimally.

Make your practice and offering of forgiveness, compassion, and love towards yourself and anyone who may have caused you harm. Remember that they are hurting too.

This past summer, while at Kripalu, I saw the sentence above written on a white board outside a children’s yoga teacher training. And in that moment, a lightbulb went off in my head.

The idea of reframing a “no” towards someone or something else as a “yes” to ourselves is incredibly empowering. When I share this concept with yoga students I often see their faces light up and several nods of understanding and recognition.

As someone who is a perpetual people-pleaser, wants everyone to be happy, and will give as much as possible, this is a life saving mantra that helps me when I have to bow out of something or say no. Because most of the time I want to say yes to everything and everyone, usually because there are great things going on and I’d love to be a part of it all. But sometimes, in order to keep a little energy for yourself, you have to say no. Because if you didn’t you’d be empty.

Sometimes this happens like the gas tank in my car. I’m not the best at paying attention to it, and suddenly, towards the end of the week, the dummy light comes on that I’m all out of gas. Then it becomes a scramble to find the nearest gas station and refill. I’ve done that too – said yes to everyone BUT myself, and after a few months found myself exhausted, sick, tearful at everything, and curled up in my bed snuggling with the dog and watching bad TV for three days. Your body and The Universe will shut you off if you run on E for too long.

Notice the people who you say “yes” and “no” to as well. Often it’s easier for me to say no to my husband because I need to do a yoga thing for work, when perhaps I should be saying no to the work related thing and yes to him and our relationship. Yes to our relationship is still a yes to me. Yoga stuff is often a yes to me as well, but what really needs the attention in that moment? Some moments are harder to say “no” to than others.

The energy of yes is open, bright, welcoming and warm. Think to yourself, “yes, yes, yes…” and notice your posture and facial expression. If you want you can think “no, no, no…” and check out the difference. But be sure at the end to come back to “yes.”

I’m not saying “no” to you, I’m saying “yes” to me. It’s a tool I’ll be using for the rest of my life. It’s an act of self-love, self-care, and self-preservation. Say yes.

xxoo

Jamie

Then after a while, you know the postures (asana) by heart, and it’s easy to trip out or check out while the teacher calls thepostures. Like after a certain amount of time we’ve been subconciously conditioned to assume the position even if we’re having an in-depth conversation with the repetitive stories in our head.

So now, we need to deconstruct the postures. To understand what lies beneath the layers of the skin, down to muscles, tendons, and bones. To try and really “get” alignment and anatomy. So we do a teacher training or deepen our studies with workshops and so on.

And because of this journey, I’ve landed in a place where moving slow and steadily seems to be winning the race. Moving slowly and mindfully while focusing on my breath, and where I am in space.

Vinyasa gets a bad rap. Most people think “power vinyasa” straight away. However the sanskrit word vinyasa means “step by step, to place in a particular way.” It doesn’t have to be fast at the expense of aligning the body in a smart and safe way.

When I think about the ways my practice has changed over the past nine years, I think it very much mirrors the life process as well. In my early 20s I was rushing around everywhere, wondering, “What’s next?” all the time. In just the past few years I’ve been working to be slightly more content with accepting what is, for the most part. Making an attempt at lingering in the moment as often as I can remember.

When I first started doing yoga, there was something magical about it. It would be impossible to recapture. The excitement of learning something new, feeling like I was part of something special, almost like a new relationship or falling in love. You can’t get enough of that feeling. That changes too, almost like the more you learn the better it gets with age, but you settle in like a fondly familiar married couple.

The results with yoga aren’t overnight. It goes from a physical activity that you need to do every day to something that becomes a way of life – being more aware of your posture or your breath or your actions (again for the most part, nobody is perfect). I was driving in some terrifying weather the other day and used a breathing exercise the whole way there. It made a difference. Life is just better with yoga.

I was never an athlete. Like we’re talking I tried softball and always ended up in right field. Up through high school I danced enough for theater (so that I wouldn’t trip over my own feet), and was notorious for joining a gym, going for a couple months, and never returning. They had a yoga class in high school, but I always got shut out of it. Rumor was it was nap time anyway.

Headed off to college and I was still adverse to physical activity, I think I set foot in the gym twice in those first two years. I was too busy catching up on all the toxic activity I’d missed out on in high school, like eating fast food and drinking cheap beer. Once I moved off campus there was a beautiful trail that my roommate and I would walk along for six miles or more at a clip – it ran all the way from Bethesda, MD to Georgetown, DC. And we both lost quite a bit of weight – physically and mentally – on those walks (sometimes jogs when she would make me). The most effective part was the quality time spent talking about what was going on in our lives, the boyfriend/school/job/friend issues we were dealing with, and being surrounded by nature in an otherwise busy city.

Towards the end of that year my mother sent me a book in the mail (that she came across in Marshalls, of course), The Little Yoga Book. “You sound stressed, I hear this helps,” the note with it said. Ok, I’ll try it. What the heck. Because I was stressed/anxious/depressed, and kind of a hot mess. So I go and get myself a little yoga kit with a mat, block, & strap, and pick up the MTV Real World Seattle Yoga video. And I was hooked. Sitting on the (really old, kind of gross) carpet of my college apartment, I loved doing that video.

When I came home my cousin, appropriately named Hope, was also doing yoga and took me to a class at a yoga studio. I didn’t even realize such a thing existed. I was hooked. “There’s a whole bunch of other people doing this too? And I can do a handstand!!!” For a girl who had been launching an attack on her body for the past several years, focused on  the shortcomings of this container that houses our spirit, my world was literally and figuratively turned upside down! I can’t quickly turned into I can, and I don’t like exercise quickly turned into me shouting “I LOVE YOGA!!” from the rooftops! Because like those walks with my college bestie, yoga is great physical activity, but it also helps you process your mental stuff as well. Like being in nature, it brings you back to center.

Since 2003, I’ve taken yoga with me everywhere, practicing in hotel rooms from LA to Montreal or seeking out studios wherever I am. I met amazing friends through yoga any time I’ve moved, and finally brought it back home with the opening of Elevate Yoga. It’s been a constant for me over the past nine years, and now I can not imagine life without yoga. Eventually, over time, it permeates everything and shifts your worldview. Sometimes I wish I’d found it sooner, and other times I’m just so grateful yoga found me at all. I still have that Little Yoga Book, the MTV video (thought it’s on loan right now to my brother’s girlfriend), and my first yoga mat. It’s important to remember where you came from.

How did yoga find you? Leave a comment below and tell me about it!

“I’ve never done yoga before and I’m not flexible.” I hear this a lot. It’s a big misconception that you have to be flexible to do yoga. We’re all put together differently and there may be poses that seem like your arch enemy. But we all have to start somewhere, and your best bet is to attend a basic vinyasa class to learn the names and shapes of common asanas (postures). We offer several of these classes weekly. I still like to attend basic classes to fine tune my practice and because I like to move slowly and mindfully!

“I work out a lot/used to dance/do gymnastics/martial arts.” You’ll probably want to take a few basic classes, but you might find yoga clicks pretty quickly and that you can move on to our open level flow classes once you learn the names and shapes of each posture. Hang out in back and secretly spy on what the other students are doing if you’re still pretty green. I wouldn’t normally recommend this because it’s really about what happens on your mat, however teachers often walk around the room more in the open level/flow classes, so it’s a little harder to see them demonstrating at the front.

“I experience anxiety/depression and am looking for something really meditative.” If this is your case, give restorative yoga or our flow into bliss class a try. These are all beginner friendly classes that focus on turning our on relaxation response and help quiet the mind.

Be sure as a new student to let the teacher know you are new to yoga and inform him or her of any injuries you might be working with. Teachers often offer hands-on adjustments to assist with alignment. If you’d rather not be touched, don’t be shy to inform the teacher of that as well. And don’t be afraid of props – they can help us make more space in poses and can be used to deepen the experience of a posture. It’s a common misconception that props are a crutch, but they can help us in many ways.

If you’re brand new and want a peek into yoga in a private or semi-private setting with lots of personal attention, we can arrange a few intro classes where you get personal attention as well. Just email us at info@elevateyoga.net and we’ll be sure to answer any of your questions. Our new student special of 3 classes for $29 is only available in person, so just come on in for your first visit.

Most importantly, remember that above all, it’s your practice. Hope to see you soon!

But because yoga is an endless path and our growth is an infinite process, our teaching might change. And hopefully it does. When I first began teaching yoga, about four years ago, I taught power vinyasa classes. I loved how a faster practice helped me to turn off the chitta vritti or endless stream of chatter in my mind. So that’s how I taught. 

Since then I’ve taken another 200 hour teacher training with YogaWorks, and all the alignment and safety stuff that I wasn’t quite sure about the first time around finally landed. And big-time. And I grew up a little (just a little). I went from teaching flowy classes with longer sequences to teaching classes that were steeped in alignment. Because I finally understood alignment and that was exciting. So I went pretty far in the other direction, demanding complete silence during class and taking myself a little too seriously. And I came under a lot of scrutiny, some students were pretty unhappy with me, but it was part of my process, and I had to go through it and come out the other side.

These days I’m taking more of a therapeutic view of things, working to understand and teach from a place of yoga to support our mental health. And I’m finding that the first 200 hour training + the second 200 hour training + trainings with Seane Corn, Bo Forbes, Jillian Pransky, and others help me to create my own style, melding my favorite bits and pieces from each learning experience, with a dash of my own personality and what’s working in my practice. Right now it feels pretty good, like coming back to center, but sure it will change again with more study. 

So I propose we all grow together. Teachers, don’t take it personally if students float in and out of class as your teaching style shifts. If something resonates with you, it will likely resonate with a student in your class. Teach from a place of safety and intelligence in sequencing, then add philosophy in a way that resonates with your spirit. Sounds like a recipe for some really delicious yoga.Your people will find you as long as you keep putting yourself out there. Students, don’t be afraid to try something new, pushing our boundaries in a safe space is part of living your yoga. Growth is an endless process. Don’t lose sight of the divine light that exists within each and every one of us. Thanks for meeting me here, namaste! xxoo

But you won’t see them if you aren’t looking. And you’ll only believe them if you so choose. Synchronicity, serendipity…call it what you’d like, but if you’re open to communication with The Universe, it talks back, and listening can help direct you on your path.

I began practicing yoga in 2003 to ease the stress of everyday life and as an enjoyable workout. Little did I know what a huge part of my life it would become, the wonderful people I would meet, and the amazing journey it would ignite.

When I began, I had no intention of making a career out of this. But by the summer of 2008, I was completing my yoga teacher training on a retreat in the Berkshires. Right before I left for the week, my husband and I decided that we would open a yoga studio, no matter how long we had to wait. We had just tied the knot in May of that year, and were excitedly thinking of our future together.

During the week away, I meditated and mulled things over. Feeling unfulfilled by what I thought was a dream job in the beauty industry, yet not brave enough to leave the safety of the corporate world to take the plunge into self-employment, I was very torn. So I put my intention out there, planting the seed that we open a yoga studio in the suburbs, someday.

Not two months later I received a job offer from a yoga clothing company, a job that seemed at the time to bridge the gap between beauty retail and yoga studio. This was one of those times when you think the divine must come into play, that your prayers have been answered. I was sent off from my corporate career, toasted with cupcakes and champagne, to follow my dream.

That job was an unexpectedly brief pit-stop on the road to Elevate Yoga, lasting all of three months. Unfortunately during that time, the economy took a huge nose dive, and my position drastically changed and was no longer what I signed on for. But the experience allowed me all I had hoped — the opportunity to get to know a lot of yoga studio owners, pick their brains, to learn what worked and what didn’t. During that time, I also worked at Devotion Yoga in Hoboken, whose owner, Liza, gave me guidance and support.

Once I was unemployed, it seemed only logical to dive right into fulfilling my dream. If not now, when? And so Elevate Yoga began to take shape. I wanted to create a studio near my hometown of Holmdel, giving back to the community that had afforded me such a lovely childhood. We found an amazing space with high ceilings in the old Hazlet school house, a perfect location.

I developed a business plan and ran numbers with my father. Mom and I went shopping for curtains and statues, and planned a big grand opening event. And my wonderful husband agreed to put all our wedding savings toward my dream of owning my very own business.

While I heard about jobs now and then, I resisted the urge to run back to the safety of a corporate career, thanks to the support and encouragement of friends and family. We opened on May 17, 2009, and have been going with the flow since.

It’s amazing how much we have grown. The friendships that have been created and our clients dedication inspires me each and every day. I feel very blessed that we were able to bring Elevate Yoga to life, and for all the success we have experienced thus far. I look forward to many years of creating memories at Elevate, watching the seed of intention grow and bloom into something beautiful.

So to anyone with a dream, I encourage you to set an intention, and stand behind it as fearlessly as possible. Thoughts become words, words become actions, and everything begins to take shape. But be careful what you wish for, as you’ll probably get it. And know that sometimes, everything needs to fall apart for creation to take place.

xxoo

Jamie

When we experience stress, our brilliant body switches on our sympathetic nervous system – the fight, flight, or flee response. It sends blood to our extremities, so we can run faster and have the energy to ward off our attacker, and takes the blood away from our internal organs – especially the digestive system. This may have worked great for our caveman ancestors who had to run away from a lion who wanted to make him lunch, but in the present day, not so much.

Imagine the feeling you get when you’re driving down Holmdel Road at dusk, and have to slam on the breaks because there are deer crossing the street. Your heart races, your breath gets shallow – that’s the action of the sympathetic nervous system. Once the deer cross, you might mellow out a bit, but the chemicals released in the body – especially cortisol – are now coursing through your system. The problem with cortisol is that it holds on to fat, in case we need to store it for energy while we are hiding from the aforementioned lion. Unfortunately, modern day life has us existing in this fight, fight, or flee mode most of the time. (Ever feel a twinge of anxiety when your cell phone rings? Yeah, that’s it.)

So what does this mean for us? We need to chill-out. By activating the parasympathetic nervous system, we can release unwanted pounds, improve digestion, nourish our internal organs, and help the body detoxify. Restorative yoga is the key.

In restorative yoga poses, the body is completely supported, so there is no muscular tension or stretch. The body is held up by props in a restorative yoga pose, so that one can relax into the support beneath them. After about twenty minutes, the parasympathetic nervous system turns on. Blood flow returns to our digestive system, allowing the body to better absorb nutrients from our food and flush out toxins, as well as the stress hormones that are floating around in our system. We’re able to find a deeper breath, oxygenating the body which increases metabolism.

A few other relaxation practices to try that support weight-loss:

Take three deep breaths before each meal. 

Savor each bite, chewing slowly and mindfully.

Breathe deeply throughout your meal.

Turn off the TV or any other distractions that could keep you from being present while eating

Mentally say a blessing over your food before you eat or find gratitude for your meal – it helps the body relax and assimilate nutrients more fully